(Click HERE to listen to the Audio podcast version.)

It was just one year ago… 

You know, there’s something about being in the same time frame as the previous year that can bring back a flood of past year memories. Though in some cases, not always all that welcome, right? 

The struggle…

It’s so clear I can almost picture it like I’m viewing the past from above. Imagine Ebenezer Scrooge visiting Christmas past… There I am, loving those sweet smelling 10 month old twin baby girls. And oh yes, nursing them every three hours. I can see myself trapped in the house while the winter freezes the outside world into a sad stillness. And in between diaper changes, soothing needy cries, and their brief naps (that I prayed would get in sync), I’m somehow scrambling to keep up with my passionless stay-at-home jobs. Jobs that my husband and I felt we desperately needed to keep up with the growing bills that come with five kids. 

Each monotonous day would pass, and there I am… anticipating the return from school of my older three kids to maybe greet me with a friendly smile. Or, maybe another request to add to the list of expectations I couldn’t live up to… I can see myself holding back the urge to call my husband to encourage his return from work, for the hope of catching a much needed hug, a potential quick adult conversation, and the hope of two more helping hands. There never seem to be enough hands, am I right? 

Looking back, it seems my soul was battling what must have been satan consuming my focus. Brainwashed to only see how exhausted I was, and how purposeless I felt. God knows that I really did know how absolutely blessed I was.  But regardless, I couldn’t shake the blues. And, sadly, It snowballed into quite the season of depression.

What started as the “blahs,” turned into a constant state of frustration because I couldn’t feel the joy that I knew I should feel, for all that I had. And I have to say it again for the record, friends – I know how blessed I am, and I knew it then. BUT, my heart and mind couldn’t wake my body from the fatigue, the weight, and the slump. And only God knows why. 

Maybe you don’t struggle with bouts of depression, but surely you can think of a time that you suffered through something, can’t you? We all suffer in some way, at some point… And how did you get through? How are you getting through?

If you lean on God, He pulls you out of your suffering, as a new improved version of you.

To make a long story short, I did come out of the haze near the start of spring. And Hallelujah! But, guess what?! I came out of it, not as the same person. Funny how that happens. We never know why God allows us to suffer, and we never know how long it will last, but when he does pull us out (and he always does if we stay close), He reveals to us an improved version of us. He reveals how awesome He is, and He reveals how much more awesome His plan is than ours. He’s pretty amazing like that!

I don’t know why I couldn’t shake the blues, but would you believe that I’m actually thankful now for that struggle because of the changed person God pulled out of that mess?!

If you’ve ever been in a season of struggle, made it out, and then reflected back, I bet you learned a thing or two also, didn’t you? I bet you can look back to all the things that God led you to in the process that, looking back, were all pieces that fit together to make you whole again. Piece by piece bringing back joy again… bringing back peace again.

I have a mental journal of those pieces. Stored in my memory bank of “things to remember next time I get sucked into the winter blues.”  I had begged God for those answers in the midst of my pain. And He showed me those steps and those puzzle pieces to teach me something.

What he reveals in the tough times are the lessons, strength and wisdom of armor for the future when life happens again. And, I hate to break it to you… “life” will happen again. But, He will do it again! He will pull you through… again! 

What can YOU do to seek God’s help in your struggle?

Seek God and His people

I pulled out all the stops last winter – seriously! I prayed, begged and pleaded with God. I read from any Christian author who had anything to say about “trusting God,” “finding joy in our struggle,” “patience,” the list goes on. I asked for prayer, I talked to Christian friends, and against the norm for me, I even tried anti-depressants (per my doctor’s recommendation). 

I pretty much drove myself nuts, wondering why I couldn’t break free. But maybe all these things helped. I think as a whole, they did. Well not the meds for me (and that’s another story). But, God used His words and so many of His people to speak truth and encouragement into my life. I went seeking, and with time, he put His perfect plan and the perfect tools in my path.  

Take Care of You

I also started doing more to take care of my physical well being. Which if you haven’t learned yet, is tied super closely to your mental, emotional and spiritual state. Don’t miss that, friends! This is important if you want to be any good for anyone. So, I drank more water, ate better, forced myself out of the house more, practiced de-stressing. And the best to note… I splurged on overnight sitters to get a couple one night getaways with my husband. One in February and one in March. AH-MA-ZING! Our new annual tradition! Don’t underestimate the need for time with that man you married! It’s good for your kids too. For all sorts of reasons. Again, another story, for another day. 

Actively seek

The point of all that was to say, I didn’t do “nothing.” I was actively seeking. When you actively seek God, in His time… He shows up and He answers. I was also actively making attempts to take care of myself so that I could be a better me for everyone else. By the way, in case you needed someone to give you permission to take of you, you’ve got it from me sister! And besides, God wants us to take care of ourselves. It’s true!

What helped you in past struggles, can help you again. 

Here’s the beauty of all of this… When God pulls you through – and He always does if we lean on Him – you are left with so much to arm yourself with for the next battle. 

Sometimes the wisdom we gain can almost completely prevent certain struggles. But other times the struggles are inevitable. And when you find yourself in the midst of the battle again, you have weapons to fight. You are a little stronger because of what He gave you, and what He will continue to provide to you.

For me this year, you better believe I planned in advance before “the fall” – to avoid “the fall” if at all possible – or at least lessen the blow. I pro-actively scheduled those overnight getaways, gatherings with friends, and pre-ordered helpful books to read. And, I’m still planning. Versus waiting until I find myself mid-battle, lashing out in wild desperate attempts to pick myself up. Planning in advance with what God taught me last season gives me so much hope, so much to look forward to, and shields of protection.

But, the winter is young, and only God knows where it’s headed. We may be good today, but will we be good tomorrow? Who knows? Maybe not! And if not, then what?

With the truths and wisdom you gained from past struggles, when you struggle again, what can you do to get through with more peace and joy? 

Oh, the flash back of a sad time I am recalling from the past. But in my case it’s a good thing this time! Because I sense my soul is much stronger than last January, much more joyful, and much more peaceful. And that’s what happens when we lean on God through our battles and proactively use the wisdom He has shared with us. Through Him we become stronger.

Though sometimes more delayed than we’d like, if we let Him, God uses our struggle for a better future…. a breakthrough. When you arm yourself with the lessons and wisdom He gave you in previous struggles, through Him, you are stronger now.  Through Him and His faithfulness, you know He will get you through. This knowledge, confidence, and truth, allows more peace and many times a little more ease. We have so much hope in this.  

Like one of my favorite Christian songs sings…

I’ve seen you move, you move the mountains
And I believe, I’ll see you do it again
You made a way, where there was no way
And, I believe, I’ll see you do it again….

Your promise still stands
Great is Your Faithfulness, faithfulness
I’m still in Your hands
This is my confidence, You never failed me yet

…And I never will forget.

Friends, I know God has shown up for you in your life. He’s certainly shown up in mine… and He’ll do it again… for each of us that invites Him to. And when you struggle, be confident in that promise… Be joyful in that promise… 

He is so faithful. And, Because of Him there is hope in our suffering today, for a better tomorrow.

(Click HERE to listen to the Audio podcast version.)

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